Talay Thai Bar
Talay Thai may look a bit saloon-ish for a Thai bar, but that’s okay. Because now we all get to do that Morricone theme song. You know, “doo-doo-doo-doo-dooo, BAW-WAW-WAW!” Kick open the doors, swagger up to the bar and order a large, cartoony looking drink with a paper umbrella in it from the helpful bar staff. Sit outdoors, looking over the calm water and think ‘bout how Jimmy the Kid died young, too young, God rest his soul. Eat a nourishing plate of pad thai as you swear revenge on Jimmy’s battered, bullet-scarred bible. He was yer pardner, an’ you ain’t resting ‘til his killer’s quick drawing with the Devil. But first, another mai tai.
Legend Wharf, Fisherman’s Wharf, +853 727-207.
Cash Box KTV
Think you’ve got what it takes? Head down to KTV and prove to your philistine friends that you sing even better OUT of the shower, thank you very much. When you gear up for your fourteenth rendition of “Copacabana,” telling your companions that, this time, you’re going to do it REALLY high, don’t be alarmed when they make their excuses and leave. They’re probably so impressed by your singing that they’re cold-calling agents, trying to get you representation. It’s about time they helped you out, anyway. When you’re all rich and famous, maybe you’ll throw a bit of business their way. If you feel like it. Freakin’ freeloaders.
Amsterdam Legend Wharf, Fisherman’s Wharf, +853 728-806.
Al’s Diner
Al’s Diner, Lan Kwai Fong, 3am, a Saturday night. There is nowhere in the world as beautiful as this. A tear springs to your eye as you sway to the dulcet, quavering voice of Simon LeBon. You bend over and hug your knees because it hurts, it hurts deep down to feel this happy, and you know that it will not last. Then again, maybe someone’s just punched you in the kidneys. So you should head over to Al’s Diner in Macau instead. Here, there’s a big, outdoor patio near the water, so if someone tries to hurt you, you can jump into the water and use a drinking straw as a snorkel.
New Orleans, Block 1, Fisherman’s Wharf, +853-297-2818.
Fashion Club
