Man of the Year
Henry Tang
Henry, it’s been tough for you these last 12 months, and we’d like to thank you for keeping us entertained throughout the year. You declared war on the post-80s generation by warning them not to be arrogant, rash and judgmental during a speech given at a function sponsored by Roundtable (a think-tank founded by young academics); you said that there was no “property hegemony” in the city and told young people there’s no reason they can’t become the next Li Ka-shing; you said that it’s “complete rubbish” that stringent security arrangements during vice-premier Li Keqiang’s visit infringed upon civil and human rights. You have also made significant contributions to Hong Kong’s budding creative industry—because your comic face has been a real favorite for internet parody makers. Of course, we’re happy to forgive that “mistake in your romantic life.” Everyone has strayed, haven’t they? You obviously deserve forgiveness, because you are the “chosen one by God,” as one of your staunchest supporters Samuel Yung Wing-ki has said. In that case, may God bless you to win the CE race. We never really had a say in who our Chief Executive will be to begin with, and you provide a lot more comic material than CY Leung.
Quitter of the Year
Graham Sheffield
We all know that the West Kowloon Cultural District project is a giant mess—there’s so much red tape and government officials know virtually nothing about arts and culture. It’s admittedly a tough job, but still, Graham Sheffield—who was hired to be Chief Executive of the WKCD—called it quits too soon. He only lasted for four months before he resigned, citing health reasons. However, two months later, he got a job as the director for the arts at the British Council.
Runner-up: Rita Fan
Calling herself the most popular candidate for Chief Executive (we’re not sure if she’s really that popular), Rita Fan hinted a countless number of times in front of the media that she would run. Then, she said that she wouldn’t go for the top job. Sometimes she said she would consider running; and sometimes she said she would not run if Henry Tang decided to go for it. Honestly, it was very tiring—and irritating—to hear all this back and forth, and it was a great relief when she declared (definitely, we hope) in November that she wasn’t going to run after all.
Public Enemy of the Year
Police Commissioner Andy Tsang
When news broke that Andy Tsang would take the job of Police Commissioner, people were worried that freedom of expression would be curbed in Hong Kong, as he was known to adopt a hard-line attitude towards demonstrators. Unfortunately, we were right to be worried. After the protest following the budget address, some protesters stayed and blocked the roads in Central. When the police tried to clear the scene, some officers pepper-sprayed the protesters without prior warning—including an eight-year-old child. Tsang refused to apologize. Heavy-handed Tsang also ordered police officers from the serious crime squad to look for the young graffiti artist who was creating “Who’s Afraid of Ai Weiwei” stencil art around the city. However, Tsang’s most ridiculous action this year was his response to the accusations that policemen obstructed journalists from reporting during Vice Premier Li Keqiang’s visit. He put forward the lame explanation that they had seen a “dark shadow” and “instinctively reached their hands to grab it” without knowing that it was a camera. Yeah, right.
Losers of the Year
The Pan-Democrats
Poor pan-democrats, look at the mess you’ve got yourselves into. First, there’s the split within the League of Social Democrats, with Raymond Wong and Chan Wai-yip founding a new political party whose sole aim is to take revenge against the Democratic Party for its support of last year’s political reforms. Then there was the Pan-Dem’s grim defeat in the District Council elections—many political heavyweights, including Lee Cheuk-yan, Tanya Chan and Longhair Leung Kwok-hung, lost their seats. Given the upcoming Legco elections, things look pretty bleak for our pan-democrat friends.
Dumbest Election Scandal
Vote Rigging
It is always said that farming is a dying industry in Hong Kong. Not true, because this year we discovered a new form of planting—and that’s the planting of votes. After the District Council elections, the media uncovered a large number of alleged cases of vote-rigging throughout Hong Kong. In Mei Foo, there were 13 registered voters with seven different surnames in one flat; some voters registered a residential address in buildings that had been demolished; in Aberdeen, a voter claimed to live in the 32nd floor of a housing estate. The kicker? It was, in fact, a 21-story building.
Runner-up: Abolishing By-Elections
Apparently, Beijing got so upset with the de-facto referendum stunt pulled by the pan-democrats earlier this year that the government—without any public consultations—decided to abolish by-elections altogether. So no matter what happens, seats vacated by legislators will be filled by the candidate who came second in the previous election. Pro-establishment legislator Pricilla Leung (pictured) even went so far as to say that voters should be “punished” if the legislators they vote for lose their seats. Even the Bar Association, which usually refrains from commenting on political affairs, has repeatedly pointed out that the proposal is unconstitutional. The public was outraged, with 220,000 marching in the July 1 demonstration to vent their anger.
Craziest Court Case
Rights for Domestic Helpers
Back in 2008, HK Magazine wrote that banning domestic workers from applying for permanent residency was discriminatory—and this stance has been confirmed this year with the High Court ruling that the immigration law’s exclusion of migrant workers is unconstitutional. In response, some Hongkongers took to the streets to protest against domestic workers, fearing that granting maids the right to apply for permanent residency will take jobs and welfare money away from locals. It’s become a very emotionally charged affair, and many of the political parties have manipulated the case for their benefit. The Civic Party has been the main target of the smearing because one of its members, Gladys Li, is the barrister representing the domestic helpers.
Runner-up: Donald Tsang Fake Punched
Back in March, Donald Tsang officiated an event commemorating the 1911 Revolution. On his way to the venue, he encountered a group of protesters from the League of Social Democrats. There was some pushing and Tsang claimed that one of the protesters had punched him in the chest. Five hours after the scuffle, he went to the emergency room of Queen Mary Hospital to do a body check as he felt a pain in his chest. The protesters were charged with disrupting public order. However, their names were cleared in September.
Fake Dead People
An end-of-year retrospective is commonplace these days, but we’re not exactly fans of the morbid “dearly departed” roundups many publications put out. But what about all of the people we fake-lost this year? Consider the following.
Jiang Zemin
Former premier Jiang was declared dead by local station ATV on July 6. But the problem was the man was still very much alive. ATV was later fined for this huge embarrassing mistake; ATV news chief Leung Ka-wing also resigned as a result.
Stanley Ho
Conspiracy theorists have said old Stanley shuffled off this mortal coil years ago, following his lengthy hospitalization and brain surgery after a fall in 2009. But no, Ho is still alive enough for his many wives and children to bicker publicly over his fortune.
Sir Run Run Shaw
Shockingly, 104-year-old Sir Run Run was declared alive after he was wheeled in, still breathing, to TVB’s board room to announce his retirement just a couple
of weeks ago.
Giant Moron Award
It was a big year for giant morons. In fact, this one is just too close to call at this stage. Consider the two leading candidates:
Financial Secretary John Tsang
By this genius’s calculations, we should have expected to run a budget deficit of $25.2 billion this fiscal year. Instead, we turned a profit of $71.3 billion. This man’s predictions were profoundly and terrifyingly wrong—what if it had gone the other way? How someone who clearly fails to grasp the basics of math could become—and then stay—the chief fiscal policymaker of this city is one of those quirks of our very special administrative region. Let’s not forget, either, that his original plan for this massive windfall was to squirrel it away into the bank, before he was forced to about-face and hand every mouthbreather in town a check for $6,000. Hey, if you’re going after the Giant Moron Award, then go all out.
Edison Chen
So you’re run out of town after taking tons of photos of yourself having sex with various starlets around town—what’s next? How about slinking back into town years later dating a 16-year-old, and then taking a bunch of candid bedroom photos with her? Actually, this might not be a moron move; there is, after all something zen-like about accepting one’s lot in life, even if it is being a total sleazeball.
Tabloid Highlights
The gossip rags had a few juicy through-lines this year, including the TVB corruption scandal, when it appeared celebrities were being overworked like pack mules at appearances and ribbon-cuttings while their shady handlers trousered all the proceeds. But two tabloid tales stood out to us as particularly dubious. First, Cecilia Cheung—once hailed as the “hero” of Edison Chen’s Sexy Photo Gate scandal (see “Giant Moron” award, below left)—was recast as the bitch-harpy scourge of the city during her ultra-public divorce from Nic Tse. We always knew she had range. But while all of that was going on, Li Ka-shing’s scion, Richard Li, quietly tossed aside one of his kept women, the once-luminous Isabella Leong, shortly after she added another male child to the dynasty. We know, it’s tragic—yet another little Li to look forward to.
Eyesore of the Year
Tamar Site
The Hong Kong government has managed to turn a small plot of harborfront land that previously served as a nice place to hold fairs and concerts and turned it into a gleaming onanistic tower to itself. The project itself courted loads of controversy. Workers rushed to meet the completion deadline, and the site had more than its fair share of industrial accidents. There really is no better lair for Little Emperor Henry to look down from next year after his coronation.
Utterly Stupid Needless Panic Commemorative Plaque
The Great Salt Run of 2011
Following Japan’s devastating earthquake, tsunami and nuclear-annihilation threat back in March, Hongkongers responded by reaching into their pockets… and using their credit cards to panic-buy as much salt as they could, following rumors that iodized salt could protect us from the negative effects of radiation. Supermarket shelves were cleared as people scrambled over each other to stockpile the precious granules. And while we were busy elbowing each other in the face for the last bag of Maldon and fretting over irradiated maki rolls, the rest of the world admired the Japanese people for their collective stoicism and sense of community in the face of disaster.
Fond Farewell
Szeto Wah
Oppressed of the Year
Ai Weiwei
In April, one of China’s best-known contemporary artists mysteriously “disappeared” at the hands of Chinese authorities as he attempted to board a flight to Hong Kong. He was then held for more than three months, allegedly for “tax evasion.” Since Tiananmen Square, Hong Kong has always been a place where people can vocalize their outrage at human rights abuses carried out on the mainland, and this time was no exception. Within days, “Who’s Afraid of Ai Weiwei” stencil graffiti began popping up all over the city, which the police responded to by commencing a criminal investigation. Art galleries also showed solidarity by pinning up posters of the artist.
HKU Protesters
Hong Kong loves a good protest, and the public was shocked back in August when a visit to HKU by Chinese vice-premier Li Keqiang was overshadowed by the gross infringement of human rights on display. Police officers took over the entire school, prevented staff and students from entering the premises and even locked one student in a stairwell to prevent him from accessing Loke Yew Hall, where the premier was attending an event. School president Tsui Lap-chee apologized to students for the incident. His contract will not be renewed, meaning that he will step down next August.
The June 4 T-Shirt Guy
The HKU debacle wasn’t the only controversy sparked by the vice-premier’s visit. During a visit to a housing estate in Lam Tin, Li chatted and mingled with residents—despite the fact that one of their neighbors, Wong Kin (pictured), had been forcibly detained by plainclothes police officers. The reason? He had been wearing a T-shirt bearing the slogan “Vindicate June 4.” To justify their actions, the police cited “security” and painted Wong a criminal by publicizing the fact that he had failed to pay a fine for jaywalking back in 2006. It’s yet another example of how the authorities are dead set on saving Beijing’s embarrassment at the cost of Hongkongers’ personal freedoms.
The Egg Waffle Guy
It’s amazing how inefficient government bureaucracy can be on things that really matter, but certain departments—such as the much-loathed Hawker Taskforce—runs with ruthless efficiency. Tai Hang’s septuagenarian egg waffle vendor Ng Yuk-fai found himself on the force’s radar this year—he was arrested and his cart confiscated no less than seven times. The last time he was arrested, he hadn’t even begun selling his snacks yet and decided to plead “not guilty” in court. Tai Hang residents and fans of his egg waffles rallied around him in support, and the FEHD was roundly criticized for unnecessarily cracking down on Ng, who sleeps in a knocked-together wooden hut and sends most of his salary to his wife and children on the mainland.
Beach Bars
Causing greater collective outrage than the illegal detention of a mainland artist, the relentless persecution of an elderly hawker and the quashing of Hongkongers’ civil liberties is the news that the city’s yuppies will no longer have access to wicker furniture and cocktails on their next visit to the beach. Yes, the government is clamping down on beach bars by installing ugly-ass, screwed-down metal furniture and making the kiosks close at 7pm so that the poor people of the Southside won’t have to listen to downtempo house past their kids’ bedtimes. To protest the move and sign a petition, find the group “Keep Hong Kong Beach Bars” on Facebook.
Needlessly Angry of the Year
Village Rage
Of all the protests we’ve seen this year, the outrage of the indigenous villagers has got to rank pretty low on the “public sympathy” list. After being told by the government to take down the illegal structures on their village houses (which, by the way, male villagers are allowed to build for free), outraged villagers began beating effigies of secretary for development Carrie Lam, who is spearheading the movement. The irate villagers also declared that they would start a revolution and would even shed blood to defend their homes. So there you go, kids—if you don’t want to obey the law, you can just kick, scream and send death threats to public officials until they back down.
Last Year in Reality
Bauhinia Woman
