Hanging with the Gyarus

I dragged my sick ass out of bed to see Nicky Hilton last Thursday at the Samantha Thavasa opening party at Ozone on top of the Ritz-Carlton. Samantha Thavasa isn’t a designer—it’s just the name of this Japanese fashion company that’s not particularly well known yet outside of Japan, although they have been using big-name western celebrities for their ad campaigns—the Hilton sisters, Beyoncé (who just gave birth to her Illuminati child Blue Ivy!) and Solange Knowles, J-Lo, Penelope and Monica Cruz, and their latest muse, Taylor Momsen of Gossip Girl notoriety (that’s the actress/singer who plays baby bitch Jenny Humphrey).

Samantha Thavasa is ULTRA-popular in Tokyo with the gyarus. “Gyaru” comes from the English word “gal,” and it’s an aesthetic subculture that emphasizes a girly glam look (dyed hair, extensions, wigs, theatrically fake eyelashes, cosmetic circle lenses for enlarged manga-character irises, fake nails).

When I was at university in Japan, I saw hordes of normal high school girls transform themselves into gyarus on trains and in the toilets of train stations by putting wigs and full makeup on (complete with fake eyelashes) just for that one train ride to school, then take it all off again in the station where they get off. I would totally just sleep in instead of waking up an hour early to impress some high school boys on the train with a fake face.

Gyaru standards of beauty are becoming increasingly popular in China. No wonder Samantha Thavasa is opening a store in Hong Kong. This time, they’ve flown in their muses Nicky Hilton and Japanese models Yuri Ebihara and Jessica Michibata. Ebihara means “shrimp field,” and my Japanese friends had a riot making fun of her: “Crab, pissing shrimp, etc.” Jessica, on the other hand, deserved our love and adoration. Well, sympathy. She was an awesome host on some sad show that did karaoke charts. And she is a half-Argentinian, half-Japanese model. Mixed-blood models with mocha skin demand our compassion because they’ve been horribly traumatized during their childhoods in Japan. She also warrants worship because she’s the girlfriend of Jenson Button, handsome British Formula One driver and 2009 World Drivers’ Champion (there’s some Japanese newspaper story every week saying that they’re getting married).

Upon arriving at the swanky Ritz-Carlton, I groaned at all of Hong Kong’s gyaru wannabes in a long line snaking around the lobby. Of course, Johannes Pong doesn’t have to queue up, so I walked straight up and announced myself to the door bitches and stressed-out hotel people and got in the elevator.

The Effervescent Online Editor of Asia Tatler obviously didn’t think the party was so fetch because she started playing Words with Friends on her iPhone whilst waiting for the fashion show to start.