A Guest Editorial by Mr. Know-It-All
Education reform is all anyone in Hong Kong can talk about these days. Newspapers are writing long columns about it in the opinion thingies in the backs of their papers. Well, since I was educated here in Hong Kong, the editors at HK Magazine invited me to write just such a thingy here for them this week.
The subject: education reform. So let us begin. My opinion on education reform is that it is a very important topic for society at large or whatnot. But, actually, my opinion is that we don’t need as much reform as everyone thinks. Let me explain with a quick PowerPoint presentation. It’s called “no-brainer” education reform because you do not need a brain to do this. OK, I’m told that we can’t actually run a PowerPoint in a printed magazine. No problem, I will just narrate it to you. It is six slides in length, so that should give you an idea of the scope and whatnot.
This is slide one. It’s a title slide that has a big curly font that says “Mr. Know-It-All’s No-Brainer Education Reform,” which is already what I explained this is. But the clip-art graphic there of the teacher in the wizard hat shows that this is really a “whiz.” This should give you some context or whatnot. Star-wipe to next slide.
This one says “My Three Main Points.” As the slide suggests, the next three slides will constitute my main points. Star-wipe. Point 1: Megaphones. The picture is of the same teacher with a wizard hat but now holding a megaphone with little lines that indicates the volume and whatnot. This is the solution to large class sizes. If there are too many students in the classroom we can adjust the volume so that all of the students will hear the list of facts they are required to memorize. Star-wipe.
Point 2: Better busy-work. If you talk to a successful Hong Kong worker today about his working life, he will tell you he is “so busy.” This is simply the state of the modern working environment in Hong Kong, so we should prepare our future generation better with more worksheets and drill sheets to help students learn how to be busy. Star-wipe.
Point 3: National Education. The problem with national education in Hong Kong is that they say they are brainwashing the students with pro-China content or whatnot. They should simply stop doing this part. Star-wipe. Final slide. The wizard teacher is now having a party with his students. This is the end.