Live and let … live
Braced to play James Bond in a lawless land, Tim Pile seems almost disappointed that Moldova and the 'non-existent' Transnistria fail to live up to their reputation
The Rough Guide to Europe on a Budget finds space for 37 countries within its 1,264 pages. Glitzy Monaco makes the cut; as does tiny Liechtenstein. There's even a chapter on Morocco, for some reason.
Moldova, a nation few people have heard of and even fewer could find on a map, doesn't merit a mention, even though it is the least expensive country on the continent. That, you'd think, should justify its inclusion in a guide with the word "budget" in the title.
Admittedly, the Eastern European state isn't blessed with many tourist attractions; or tourists for that matter. Nevertheless, visitors to Chisinau (pronounced "kish-i-now") will discover an agreeable city of leafy streets, relaxing parks and easily accessible vineyards. There's little to indicate that you're in the capital of Europe's poorest country. Stylishly dressed shoppers congregate at MallDOVA; there are plenty of performance cars revving at traffic intersections and swanky restaurants are packed with local biznesmeni.
The remote republic, wedged between Romania and Ukraine, has a darker side, though. When it comes to con tricks and scams, Moldova is a minefield - if you believe scaremongering online travel forums. You can expect to be pickpocketed by packs of gypsy children and misled into paying exorbitant amounts for items sneakily added to restaurant bills. And if you report these crimes to the police they are almost certain to plant drugs on you. Male travellers are likely to be seduced by Slavic femme fatales, who lure their victims to romantic venues for flirtatious liaisons before drugging them with bitter-tasting coffee.
It all sounds rather intimidating but I'm fascinated. I may never get another chance to play James Bond.