I got excited when I saw you were writing about bananas recently. I thought you were finally going to talk about banana powders for make-up, but then it was only about bags.

Falling for Bananas, Pok Fu Lam

The Dictator: Was that a question or an insult? No matter. The words of someone so keen to look like Kim Kardashian can hardly wound. That is what you're after, isn't it? I note you carefully omitted mention of the reality-television star, who ignited interest in layer upon layer of make-up to create the illusion of perfection, contouring, etc. Well, actually, it was her make-up artist, Mario Dedivanovic. Now, you try-hard, banana powders are not called that because they are made from the fruit. It's because of their colour. If you'd read anything I've written about colour correcting make-up, you'd have got that and wouldn't have had to embarrass yourself in print. Said yellow-hued powder is primarily used to reduce redness and minimise the appearance of dark circles, and it also works well as a setting powder. Dedivanovic's banana powder of choice is by Ben Nye (HK$239; May's, JD Mall, 233 Nathan Road, Jordan). It's a loose, mattifying, translucent finishing powder that is said to suit most skin tones. Just about any cosmetics company worth its colour correctors will have a suitable alternative. Now, let's be clear. Will properly applied contouring, powders, and special make-up effects make you look better on camera? Absolutely. Will it look good face to face? No comment.

I almost spat out my morning coffee when I read that DHL T-shirts are in fashion. Are they joking? If this were a thing, I feel sure you would have already made fun of them. Is this all some clever marketing ploy? Come on Dictator, please weigh in!

Feeling Moved, Mid-Levels

The Dictator rules: Charming. I know a good stain remover for that. Anyway, what's so unusual about fashion and art appropriating consumer brand images? The design lines became blurred long ago. Hello? Ever heard of Moschino? The Italian label has offered numerous tongue-in-cheek riffs on brands such as Barbie, McDonald's and SpongeBob SquarePants. Or take Anya Hindmarch's supermarket-inspired designs featuring Cadbury's, Kellogg's, etc. If you were surprised before, you'll be shocked to learn that said T-shirt, by Vetements, costs about HK$2,000. That's each, for a yellow T-shirt with a slightly modified red DHL logo across the chest. Come on, you know you want one. It's sold out almost everywhere, but we did find a few at ssense.com (HK$2,057). Apart from mugging DHL delivery staff, you do have a few more ways to get your hands on a DHL tee. Dhlonlinestore.com offers yellow and red hats, shirts, bags and much more. The round-neck, 100 per cent cotton tee is yours for about HK$50, with a minimum order of 100 pieces, that is. There are also a few floating around eBay alongside staff uniforms and sponsored football jerseys (HK$88 and up).

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