First cousins but not equals: how Chinese slice and dice familial relationships, and two Song dynasty cousins who couldn’t have been further apart

If you struggle to work out who your second cousin, once removed is, try grasping the multiple terms – 8 at least – Chinese use just to describe first cousins

Two surprising first cousins in Chinese history were beloved poet Li Qingzhao and hated official’s wife Madam Wang, blamed for heroic general Yue Fei’s death

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Chinese tenor Yijie Shi (left) as Jin Baoyu and South Korean soprano Pureum Jo as Lin Daoyu, one of the two first cousins his character is in love with, in a dress rehearsal for a production of “Dream of the Red Chamber”. The Chinese language has multiple terms for first cousins depending on their parentage. Photo: Xinhua

Having lived his whole life in the modern cities of Singapore and Hong Kong, Wee Kek Koon has an inexplicable fascination with the past.

Published: 9:45am, 5 Aug 2023

When I was doing research for this column a few weeks ago, I came across a mind-blowing piece of historical trivia about two of the most well-known women in Song period China (960-1279).

Li Qingzhao (1084-1155) was one of the greatest Chinese poets, and probably the most famous female poet China has ever produced. Almost 870 years after her death, we are still reading, reciting and enjoying her sublime works.

The infamous Madam Wang, wife of prime minister Qin Hui (1091-1155), remains one of the most hated women in Chinese history. Rightly or wrongly, generations of Chinese have held her partly responsible for the conspiracy against the heroic general Yue Fei, which led to his downfall and death.

Imagine my surprise when I discovered that the much loved Li Qingzhao and the deeply reviled Madam Wang were first cousins! It turns out that Li’s mother and Wang’s father were siblings.

Song dynasty poet Li Qingzhao, painted by Qing dynasty painter Jiang Xun (1764-1821).

Among English-speakers of European heritage, the word “cousin” refers to multiple blood relations scattered across generations in one’s family tree. For example, a great grandchild of your great-great grandparent could be your “second cousin, once removed”.