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Inside Elon Musk and first wife Justine Wilson’s murky marriage: their trans daughter Vivian Jenna Wilson just ditched his name for her mum’s, but what was their pre-fame relationship really like?

Elon Musk and first wife Justine Wilson revealed secrets from their marriage in 2000-2008, which the Tesla CEO said helped make 2008 a ‘nightmare year’. Photos: TEDx Talks/YouTube, Reuters
Justine Wilson met Elon Musk while they were still young, carefree and ambitious, studying at Queen’s University, Canada. Together, they had five children together – Griffin, Vivian (now estranged from her father), Kai, Saxon and Damian – and their marriage, lasting from 2000-2008, was one that people looked up to. They had met as students trying to make ends meet and grew to have extreme wealth and famous friends. But, when they announced their split in 2008, secrets from their marriage soon started to come out.
Elon Musk with first wife Justine Wilson. Photo: @elonmusk/Instagram

Two years after their bitter split, with a financial battle looming, Wilson gave the whole world a look into her marriage to Musk. Here are just some of the revelations she discussed in an essay she wrote for Marie Claire in 2010, as well as other surprises from Musk’s first marriage.

Elon Musk with the five children from his marriage to Justine Wilson. Photo: @elonmusk.ab/Instagram

The obsession with blonde hair

Justine Wilson during her TEDx Talk, Wounded People Tell Better Stories. Photo: TEDx Talks/YouTube

Wilson said that, during their relationship, Musk pressured her to change her hair colour to blonde. She said when she first met him while they were studying in Canada, she was not blonde. During the course of their marriage, he pushed her to get highlights and even to “go platinum”.

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Justine Musk, Elon Musk’s first wife and the mother to his five sons. Photo: @justinemusk/Twitter

By the end of their marriage, Wilson said she barely recognised herself. In the Marie Claire piece, Wilson said she had become “very thin” and “very blonde” during her marriage. She admitted she had turned into a trophy wife and it was never a role she fitted into.

The scary wedding dance

Elon Musk arrives for the 2022 Met Gala at New York’s Metropolitan Museum of Art, on May 2. Photo: Getty Images
According to Wilson, during their wedding dance in 2000, he told her “I’m the alpha in this relationship”. She said she thought nothing of it at the time and attributed the comment to his upbringing, which she described as “male-dominated”. But as time went on, she said he treated her like a staff member and she would tell him, “I am not your employee”. She said he would reply, “If you were, I would have fired you.”

Raging arguments

Justine Wilson, now a published author. Photo: @beingbeethoven/Instagram

As their marriage hit the rocks, Wilson said she realised she was “the starter wife”. She said Musk was obsessed with work and while she couldn’t criticise his brilliance, she longed for intimacy. When she raised these issues with him, she said he would say “she read too much”, insinuating that books were feeding her thoughts.

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Musk moved on quickly

Elon Musk with English actress Talulah Riley. Photo: @upskill.mentor/Instagram
After being involved in a car accident, Wilson described how she realised she was not happy with her life or in her relationship. She spoke to Musk and he agreed to counselling, but just a month later said that if they didn’t fix the marriage that day, they should divorce. The next day she was handed divorce papers, and just six weeks later he sent Wilson a text message to say he was engaged to British actress Talulah Riley. According to Wilson, she reached out to Riley and the two developed a relationship, even though they were pitted against each other. “I liked her,” said Wilson.

In a 2017 interview with Rolling Stone, Musk said that if he is not with a long-term companion, he is not happy. He told the interviewer that sleeping alone “kills me”.

Nightmare year

SpaceX founder Elon Musk at a news conference, in January 2020. Photo: Reuters

Despite moving on quickly, in a recent conversation with the Tesla Owners of Silicon Valley Club, Musk described 2008 as a “nightmare year”. Fox Business reported that he was speaking about the early days of Tesla, with problems with financing and with his marriage falling apart. “Good times,” he joked. “Extremely brutal to say the least – the lowest of lows,” he told the owners. It was one of the few times he has spoken about his personal life.

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  • Wilson spoke about being the Tesla CEO’s ‘starter wife’ in a 2010 essay for Marie Claire; Musk got engaged to British actress Talulah Riley right after the divorce
  • The pair share five children together – Griffin, Vivian, Kai, Saxon and Damian – but Wilson said Musk treated her like a staff member and called himself the ‘alpha’ in the relationship