This was not a frivolous trip. When my father died of natural causes in December 2020, my mother declared that we would gather for a memorial service when it was safe. After a year that saw our family members triple vaccinated, a small private ceremony of Mom and the kids was set for December 11.

And so, after two weeks in a frustratingly lackadaisical America, dread and questions are the order of the hour. The pre-flight rapid test 72 hours before returning to Hong Kong via Los Angeles is the first potentially devastating hurdle.

If I test positive, Cathay Pacific won’t allow me to board the plane, an outcome that has serious ramifications for work – how patient can employers be with effectively AWOL staff? – and in my case, for home, as I’m due to move house in mid-January and not being there will spawn new nightmares.

The risks of exposure to Covid-19 are high after two weeks in a country where many people assume that freeing your nose from the confines of the mask is epidemiologically effective in preventing transmission.

Flights across America feature passengers who stock themselves with food for long periods just to avoid wearing those pesky masks – hey, no need to don them while eating or drinking, so why not eat the whole flight? Sod their fellow passengers.

In fear of having been exposed on my two flights or elsewhere in maskless and unvaxxed America, I wait up for my results until midnight, the night before my flight. After a moment’s panic when I notice they have listed all possible outcomes of the test – I find I have tested negative. So now I can at least fly to fortress Hong Kong.

Tough Hong Kong quarantine rules unsustainable as Omicron spreads, experts warn

Which brings us to the extra measure of dread: I now face looming incarceration in the government’s notorious quarantine centre at Penny’s Bay, an added dose of caution authorities introduced for travellers returning from high-risk countries like the United States, where 800,000 people, or the equivalent of more than 10 per cent of Hong Kong’s population, have died of various strains of Covid-19.

Penny’s Bay has gained notoriety as the recent home of pilots who violated travel rules while abroad, along with scores who came into contact with them or their relations – entire families and even classrooms of small schoolchildren and others potentially exposed were rapidly ensconced at the facility to rule out community infection. The rather draconian measures worked and there was no local outbreak.

Still, having not seen it but facing a week there, Penny’s Bay conjures images. Internment camps, maybe not. Martin Sheen lamenting “I’m still only in Saigon!” at the start of Apocalypse Now, for certain. Is it as bad as some say? Is the notoriety unwarranted? What’s the food like? Is the Wi-fi strong enough to work? Are the beds really that hard and horrible? The food… oh no. The word “compulsory” in any incarnation allows the mind to race.

The answers will present themselves soon enough. My flight lands in a few hours. Another PCR test at the airport and – presuming I’m negative – I will soon be entering the bowels of Penny’s Bay, and a regime of daily nasal-swab testing and life in quarters that appear to be crafted from shipping containers and are no doubt posted with threats of major fines and serious jail time for breaking the cordon.

At my editors’ request, I will be providing a day-by-day report of what it is like to go through a week in one of the world’s strictest quarantine centres.

Wish me, and my fellow travellers aboard CX873 from the United States to Hong Kong, good luck.

What’s next: Day 1. Passing through the gates of Penny’s Bay