Making strides: Hong Kong student fights low self-esteem to improve herself and help others
- Ko Wing-lam overcomes tough family situation, insecurity to become a finalist in Best Improvement category for Student of the Year Awards
- Another finalist, Rachel Yu, learns to let go of perfectionism streak and make improvements step by step
Ko Wing-lam has been battling low self-esteem since she was young.
The 20-year-old Form Six student had a poor relationship with her mother, who placed tough demands on her and berated her “all the time” whenever she did something wrong. Her father rarely intervened when the scoldings occurred.
Student of the Year 2020/21 - Positive Thinking
Her mother also seemed constantly stressed by the family’s difficult financial situation, which was compounded by the huge debts run up by Ko’s uncle.
Riddled by self-doubt because of the constant scoldings, Ko said she used to feel insecure and viewed herself as a “failure”, as she did not seem to show improvement.
Despite being able to enter her mother’s preferred secondary school, Ko failed most of her subjects because she was not interested in studying and was told to repeat Form One twice. Instead, she spent a lot of time taking part in extracurricular activities.
SOTY 2021: Creative Thinking And Audience Engagement Matter For This Year’s Visual Artist Winner
Teachers also encouraged her to volunteer for organisations such as the Rotary. Ko said she enjoyed being able to help others through her volunteer work.
She was awarded a harmony scholarship by the government’s Home Affairs Department in 2016-17, in recognition of her participation in school and community services, particularly in promoting racial harmony.
In the last few years, Ko has been able to mend her relationship with her mother, and the pair often have dim sum at Chinese restaurants and buy groceries together. Ko has also felt more comfortable sharing about her life with her mother.
“I came to understand from my classmates that each family might have its own problems,” she said. “There are classmates who grew up in a single-parent family, or both their parents passed away. But for me, I still get to embrace the warmth from my parents.”
Another finalist, Rachel Yu Pui-hang, described herself as someone obsessed with perfection, a mentality that plagued her for years and affected various aspects of her life.
The 17-year-old student from the elite Good Hope School recalled she had been chasing academic excellence and comparing herself with her classmates, spending hours on homework with little time for rest. This eventually took a toll on her health last year.
She was forced to take sick leave for weeks, which made her realise that being perfect was not the only way to lead her life.
Teen’s mental health work earns her spirit awards nomination
Following her recovery, she took part in her school’s student union election, but failed in her bid for a seat on the committee. Despite the setback, Yu said she learned to view the experience positively as it helped break her out of her comfort zone and she managed to challenge herself to make public speeches.
“I feel that not everything has to be perfectly done,” she said. “As long as I have tried my best, it would already be great. Improvements can come step by step.”
The Student of the Year awards presentation ceremony will be held on Saturday.
