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A recent wedding in China sparked a debate about an old tradition of the brother hiding during the ceremony. Photo: SCMP Composite

‘Go hide yourself’: single Chinese man observes odd ritual demanding he stay out of sight at younger brother’s wedding, sparking outdated customs debate

  • Hiding practice dates back to feudal times and is among a series of odd historical rituals observed across China
  • Older brother’s out-of-sight act sparks fierce online debate over the modern-day validity of such traditions

A fierce online debate over Chinese customs has flared up after a family in southwest China made their unmarried 25-year-old son hide from his younger brother on the day of his wedding to avoid bad luck.

The unmarried elder brother, surnamed Hu, from Zunyi in Guizhou province, observed the local hiding tradition, which is designed to prevent the exposure of an older sibling of the bridegroom to the happy couple during the nuptial kneeling segment of the wedding ceremony, Xibu Juece reported.
Prior to the big day, Hu’s parents continually reminded him that traditional customs must be observed, and while he was fully aware that the superstitious practice dated back to feudal times he went ahead to keep his family happy.
Hu’s experience sparked a conversation about tradition in China. Photo: Weibo

On Tuesday, the day of the wedding Hu posted a self-filmed viral video of himself hiding as relatives and friends assembled outdoors to celebrate for his younger brother’s big day.

“When the time came, my parents told me to go away for a while, suggesting I hide in the toilet,” Hu told Xibu Juece.

Hu declined to hide in the toilet and instead found a discreet spot in the backyard, which kept him out of sight from the about-to-be newly weds.

“As long as the bride couldn’t see me, it would be fine. This is our custom,” Hu said, adding: “It took about 10 minutes for the bride to do the kneeling ritual, then I was free again.”

After completing the ritual, Hu joined the celebrations and stood next to his brother and sister-in-law for a photograph.

The superstition of unmarried Chinese men staying out of sight at a younger brother’s wedding dates back to feudal times. Photo: Getty Images

Hu’s story has sparked an outpouring of discussions about traditional wedding customs in mainland China.

One online observer said: “Am I the only one who thinks it’s very ridiculous?”

Another said: “It’s very similar to my hometown. If the younger sister is getting married, the unmarried elder sister was not allowed to show up until the start of the wedding banquet.”

A similar story also went viral last month, when a 31-year-old unmarried elder sister in southern China said she had hidden herself on the rooftop of her home for the weddings of her four younger siblings.

According to Asia Wedding Network, if you get married before your elder brother, you should buy him a new pair of trousers as the Chinese word for the item of clothing sounds the same as wealth.

To show respect, the bride and groom will enter their new home under the elder brother’s new trousers, which should be hung across the main door of the home.

It is also required that the older brother is not at home when the couple enter the house for the first time. This act is to show respect to the elder brother and symbolise the couple being on equal terms with the older sibling despite his unmarried status.

If a woman is getting married before their elder sister, the same rules apply but a skirt is used instead of trousers. However, some believe walking under a skirt will bring bad luck so buy the elder sister a new skirt instead.

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