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free to be me

Have you a got a question for Jaime? E-mail her at [email protected]

Dear Jaime,

It's time for me to choose my main subjects at school. My father has chosen them for me because he thinks he is wiser and knows what will be best for my future career. But he has chosen all the subjects that I dislike, and I know that I am going to fail them because I am not interested in them. Should I bring this up with him and get into an argument, or should I just save the peace and accept his choices?

Sharon

Hi Sharon,

I understand how you feel, as my parents did the same to me when I was at school.

They only do it because they care about your future.

You have a big decision on your hands - to confront or not.

You mention you don't want to cause an argument, and while I can appreciate that, have you thought that by not bringing it up, you may cause more arguments in the long term?

You may feel resentful at home because you don't enjoy studying, and, if you fail, you and your parents will get upset.

By not standing up now to talk about how you are feeling, you are just delaying the confrontation.

Can you ask your parents if you can sit down together and have another look at all your subjects and come to an agreement about which ones to choose?

An agreement means that both parties are willing to negotiate.

The key to peaceful relationships is honesty.

Good luck!

Hi Jaime,

I have to start choosing which university I would like to go to. This is so hard because there are so many good schools in Hong Kong and overseas - how should I approach it?

Simon

Hello Simon,

I encourage you to see this as a fun activity.

Up until now, you have probably gone to the school that your parents chose for you.

Now you get the chance to have your say.

Firstly, do you know what you want to study? If so, this may help narrow it down.

For example, if you want to study something in the sports field, you would want to go to a university that is known for its sports degrees or facilities.

If you want to become a doctor, teacher, businessman, or numerous other career choices, have a look at the universities that specialise in related courses.

Another big issue is where you want to live.

This may be your first chance to experience the world and live in a different country.

Do some research on the culture and laws of the countries you are thinking about going to.

Many countries are very different from Hong Kong and some of the laws you may not agree with.

You also need to ask yourself how far you want to be away from home.

Are you going to have the financial support behind you to be able to come back home during holidays if you live really far away?

If not, you should consider a university closer to Hong Kong rather than too far away.

Use this opportunity to choose a university that will take you closer to achieving your goals and dreams.

Jaime

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