Go ahead, make your day

My fiance and I toyed with the idea of seeking professional help with planning our wedding, but as two bona fide Hongkongers - and with the motto that whatever money we saved could be splurged on the honeymoon - we were hesitant to accept that it would really be worth paying someone else to tell us where to find what in our home town.

A large organisational task can seem insurmountable before you start - so get started. You'll be amazed at how much better you'll feel when you've taken just one question mark out of the equation. Don't know where to begin? The internet abounds with wedding websites offering free advice on everything from choosing your dress, invitations and venue, to weeding out less-than-essential guests and employing tactful seating strategies. As a one-time panicked bride-to-be who had wasted 18 months of potential planning time, The Knot (www.theknot.com) gets my seal of approval.

Most wedding websites will prioritise tasks for you, but just remember to take their timelines with a generous pinch of salt. You should have found your dress nine months in advance, according to some experts. Relax - dresses don't take as long as human beings to come into existence, and especially not in Hong Kong. Of course, the sooner you start the more relaxed you will feel, but a safe lead time would be five to six months, to allow time for alterations and any unforeseen circumstances.

With dress ideas and wedding themes floating around your head, it's time to decide when and where the big day will take place. Finding the answers to these questions is paramount, not just from the point of view of booking a venue and sending out invitations, but also when it comes to the bride's, groom's and bridal party's attire.

Bearing in mind the time of year, do you envisage an indoor or outdoor wedding, traditional or contemporary in theme, casual or formal in style? Here, you can really afford to just dream. Whatever sits right with you (and not what your parents or friends are telling you) is the thing to go for.

And with the recently implemented legislation allowing weddings in Hong Kong to be held at any time of day and just about anywhere, the sky's the limit.

Having booked the venue and confirmed that it can hold all of your guests (expect around two thirds and plan for three quarters of the number you invite), it's never too early to start looking at wedding invitations. You should factor in time for printing (remembering any pesky public holidays) and, of course, mailing overseas. Aim to have invitations in your guests' hands six weeks before the big day, and set up an e-mail account for RSVPs. If you're having a gift registry, include the link to the registry on your invitations.

For the bride, shoes and accessories can seem like a headache, but the most simple adornments are often the most elegant, so just relax. Veils are so passe, and you can use jewellery sparingly to draw attention to the main attraction - the dress. Shoes need to be easy to walk in when worn together with the dress. Remember that no one is going to be looking at your feet, and you certainly won't want to be either.

Apart from pacing around in your wedding outfit to your heart's content, another great way to feel in control is to have a practice hair and makeup session. It should really be compulsory, if only for your peace of mind. Shop around, and ask for recommendations from friends and family.

Having sent out the invitations and satisfied yourself with how you're going to look, you'll be ready to decide on the menu and alcohol. We chose an excellent Brut that closely approximated champagne and was around half the price - important when you have nearly 150 people toasting. You will also need to decide on the all-important floral decorations. Again, shop around, and ask for recommendations.

While planning your wedding may seem at first like a crushing burden, the beauty of doing so (apart from the money saved) is that, unlike with work or household chores, tackling the ins and outs of your special day is actually fun.

There is nothing quite like the satisfaction that comes from overseeing an event that is all about you and the person you want to spend the rest of your life with. This is one of those times when you and your partner's opinions definitely win the day - and there's no need to feel guilty about it.

One final word of advice: delegate. You can be the expert planner, but don't even think about being the expert caterer or florist or dressmaker.

These things really are best left to the professionals.

Timeline:

Six months to wedding

Fix wedding date if you haven't already

Decide on theme of wedding

Start looking at dresses

Set up gift registry (optional)

Five months to wedding

Finalise guest list

Finalise wedding venue (Can it comfortably accommodate guests?)

Start looking at invitations

Decide on theme colour (for flowers, bridesmaids' dresses) bearing in mind venue decor

Four months to wedding

Finalise invitations and send to printer (print around 20 per cent more than needed as contingency)

Start talking to florists

Start looking at bridal shoes and accessories (jewellery, veil if any)

Three months to wedding

Mail out invitations (include deadline for RSVPs)

Final alterations to dress

Finalise shoes and accessories

Groom and bridal party should go for fittings

Two months to wedding

Meet with restaurant to decide on menu

Make deal with restaurant on alcohol or find supplier

Meet with florist to decide on arrangements

Do trial hair and makeup

One month to wedding

Final dress fitting

Second trial hair and makeup if needed

Make seating plans

One week to wedding

Hold wedding rehearsal at venue at same time of day

Facials and massages for bride and groom

Write wedding speech if any

The wedding

Leave the details to the experts and enjoy your big day!