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Tom Bell

Thursday night football carries unflattering connotations, but it’s all relative.
For a club such as Manchester United, playing in Europe would preferably mean a place among the elite of the Uefa Champions League, which books up your Tuesdays and Wednesdays.
Continental fixtures later in the week indicate you’re playing for one of the lesser prizes. So it is that the humble Thursday was weaponised to tease United about their fall from grace.
The spiral has lasted long enough that any pot bearing a Uefa logo would now be welcomed into the Old Trafford trophy cabinet, and the same must be true for Tottenham Hotspur. Both were playing on a Thursday while you were sleeping.

Spurs day
Football chiefs have done much to strip the Europa League of jeopardy and prestige by lowering the bar for entry and tampering with the format, but it has a long and storied history, which counts for something … doesn’t it?
One recalls when the Champions League wasn’t watered down and anyone who hadn’t won their domestic league – very good teams – dreamed of lifting the Uefa Cup, as it was then.
Take the star-studded Inter Milan who did so in 1991. Or Diego Maradona’s only European triumph, with Napoli in 1989. Ipswich Town’s fairy-tale crown in 1981. Or their rivals Norwich City beating Bayern Munich in the second round in 1993-94. Glory days and nights.
Tottenham know about those, having won the first-ever edition in 1972 and gone all the way again in 1984. And they made it two wins from two this season, beating Ferencvaros 2-1.
Pape Sarr put Spurs ahead against the champs of the Nemzeti Bajnoksag, Hungary’s top league, firing in from the right of the six-yard box in the 23rd minute.
Only four starters remained at the Groupama Arena from the 11 who tonked United 3-0 last Sunday, manager Ange Postecoglou throwing in teenagers Mikey Moore, Will Lankshear, Archie Gray and Lucas Bergvall.
By the end, the big guns of James Maddison, Brennan Johnson and Dom Solanke were on, and Johnson’s left boot doubled the lead after 86 minutes. Barnabas Varga got one back in stoppage time.

Neither dead nor truly alive
Erik ten Hag’s continued employment by United was tested again in a 3-3 draw at Porto, salvaged by Harry Maguire’s stoppage-time equaliser. He’s been dubbed “dead man walking” so many times that it begs the question of how far someone can trek in that curious state before being pronounced an ex-gaffer.
The Dutchman was handed the punishment of plodding on following that pasting by Spurs, in which United were labelled “disgusting” by former captain Gary Neville.
Ten Hag’s order was to turn madness into motivation. So, were they unappetising again at the Estadio Do Dragao, or did they revolt, in a good way?
Initially the former. A seventh-minute opener from Marcus Rashford was the response called for, as was a second goal after 20 by Rasmus Hojlund.
Then things turned nauseating for Ten Hag, who watched Pepe and Samu Omorodion make it 2-2.
Porto upped the disgust, Omorodion striking again after 50, before a stomach-churning finale: United’s Bruno Fernandes sent off (again – now will this too be rescinded?) and Maguire’s leveller, a header from Christian Eriksen’s cross.
Blue days, lots of them
What do you mean, you don’t care about the Conference League?
Well, yes, the lowest-tier Uefa comp may have given Thursdays an even worse name – with apologies to Noah, Jagiellonia Białystok and Borac Banja Luka.
Chelsea, like United, had got used to being busy on Tuesdays and Wednesdays, yet find themselves grubbing around here.
It’s how they came to be beating Gent 4-2 on a Thursday. They showed immediate interest, Renato Veiga opening the scoring after 12 minutes. Pedro Neto added another straight after half-time, and although Tsuyoshi Watanabe replied, Christopher Nkunku and Kiernan Dewsbury-Hall had Chelsea on top before Omri Gandelman’s consolation.
Fourth in the early English Premier League standings, Chelsea could be contenders to add to their two triumphs apiece in the Champions League, Europa League and the Cup Winners’ Cup (abolished in 1999 – don’t get us started on this) and become the first side to “complete” European football. At least, this version of it, until the next meaningless comp is added.

With their absurdly bloated squad, they may just have the staying power. None of the starters who beat Brighton last weekend were on Thursday duty.
Like the Europa, the group stage involves 36 teams and not until late February will we be shot of the worst of them. The top eight shall reach – with relief or regret? – the round of 16, while ninth to 24th are forced to carry on until eight of them beg to leave.
Fairly clear-cut
In basketball, Indiana Fever’s Caitlin Clark was named WNBA Rookie of the Year, and let’s just say it was never in doubt.
Clark’s debut year saw her set a single-season record of 337 assists and all-time rookie records of 769 points and 122 three-pointers.
So when sportswriters and broadcasters sat down to cast their votes, there may as well have been no other names on the ballot paper: 66 of the 67 votes went to Clark.
We would love to hear from the lone dissenter.

Short and snappy
Cricket World Cups can feel laboured, but the 10-team women’s T20 version, which began in the United Arab Emirates, looks a breeze – Uefa take note.
We’re promised it’ll be done and dusted inside three weeks, and Pakistan got straight into stride, beating Sri Lanka by 31 runs.
They reached 117, boosted by captain Fatima Sana after slumping to 84-8. Left-arm spinner Sadia Iqbal then took three Sri Lankan wickets, and Nashra Sandhu, Omaima Sohail and Sana two each.
Bangladesh bagged their first victory in this tournament in a decade, thanks to a 16-run win over Scotland. Their batters mustered a vulnerable-looking 119-7, but their bowlers limited the Scots to 103-7.
“No matter how good the cricket we play, if it doesn’t translate into victory, it means nothing,” Bangladesh captain Nigar Sultana Joty said. “After a long time, I feel like we have done something.”
And finally
Let’s admit, we were all mildly piqued by the Conference League ties we pilloried earlier. We can reveal Armenian outfit Noah swatted aside the Czechs of Mlada Boleslav 2-0.
Borac Banja Luka, champions of Bosnia and Herzegovina, welcomed Panathinaikos. The Greeks led but it ended 1-1.
It fell to Jagiellonia Białystok to provide the drama. Polish league winners last season for the first time, they conjured a 97th-minute winner from Darko Churlinov to win 2-1 at Kobenhavn.
Don’t deny it: European football never stops giving.


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While you were sleeping

Man United shred Ten Hag’s nerves, Caitlin Clark crowned: what happened in sport overnight

Porto’s Samu Omorodion celebrates scoring his side’s third goal against Manchester United. Photo: AP

Tottenham players look reasonably happy to be out on a Thursday after Brennan Johnson’s strike. Photo: Reuters

Erik ten Hag has plenty to discuss with Manchester United’s Matthijs de Ligt in Porto. Photo: AP

Kiernan Dewsbury-Hall is positively ecstatic with his Thursday night’s work. Photo: Action Images via Reuters

Caitlin Clark was a near-unanimous choice as Rookie of the Year. Photo: Reuters

Real Madrid, Bayern Munich stunned in Champions League as Doncic to miss week of preseason

Aston Villa’s Jhon Duran (left) and Lucas Digne celebrate after their famous Uefa Champions League win against Bayern Munich. Photo: AP

Bayern Munich manager Vincent Kompany consoles his players after their defeat to Aston Villa. Photo: DPA

Arne Slot is enjoying his start to life at Liverpool with a second consecutive Champions League win. Photo: AP

Contrasting emotions as a dejected Kylian Mbappe walks past ecstatic Lille players. Photo: Reuters

Dallas Mavericks guard Luka Doncic has suffered an injury to his left calf in training. Photo: Reuters

Arsenal beat PSG, Celtic hammered in Champions League and it’s Sinner v Alcaraz in Beijing

Arsenal’s Bukayo Saka celebrates with his teammates as his goal helped seal a 2-0 victory over Paris Saint-Germain in the Uefa Champions League. Photo: Reuters

Arsenal manager Mikel Arteta salutes the fans after victory over PSG in the Uefa Champions League. Photo: EPA

Inter Milan’s Mehdi Taremi celebrates after rounding off a 4-0 win over Red Star Belgrade. Photo: DPA

Italy’s Jannik Sinner beat China’s Bu Yunchaokete to set up a final showdown with Carlos Alcaraz in Beijing. Photo: AFP

Saints stumble, Biden’s bold statement, what happened overnight in the world of sport

Southampton’s players troop off the field after their latest Premier League defeat at Bournemouth. Photo: Reuters

Russell Martin slammed his players for playing with ‘no courage, no effort and no intensity’. Photo: Reuters

Samuel Eto’o is not allowed to watch any matches involving Cameroon for the next six months. Photo: AP

Sport

Football

Cricket

Basketball

Spurs’ and Chelsea’s European adventures and the start of the Women’s T20 World Cup also feature


Spurs’ and Chelsea’s European adventures and the start of the Women’s T20 World Cup also feature.


Man United shred Ten Hag’s nerves, Caitlin Clark crowned: what happened in sport overnight

.css-1c6uqr6{color:inherit;font-weight:inherit;font-size:inherit;font-family:inherit;line-height:inherit;overflow-wrap:break-word;}Spurs’ and Chelsea’s European adventures and the start of the Women’s T20 World Cup also feature

Spurs day

Spurs’ and Chelsea’s European adventures and the start of the Women’s T20 World Cup also feature