If relationships are failing, it is not due to some predetermined fate but rather the result of various factors, perhaps including neglect of personal growth. The Yijing submits that we should not passively await our supposed destiny while sitting back, but should actively engage in ziqiangbuxi (self-improvement without rest) and houde (deepening our virtue). We should engage proactively or retreat temporarily as circumstances dictate, while persisting with personal development.

In closing, we would like to send a message to our social media-savvy young friends – do not allow scammers to swindle you out of your money. Instead, use the Yijing to promote your personal growth and maturation. Success or failure in life can be influenced by the conditions you create, and this book can help you create those conditions.

It is not that important if your ex does not come back, but you can find meaning in life if you work on long-term goals. This is a main guiding thought from our study of the Yijing.

Elizabeth Woo Li, founder, Sinological Development Charitable Foundation

Change parents’ mindset to relieve student stress

Earlier this month, a survey by the Hong Kong Federation of Youth Groups found that 42 per cent of the students surveyed had experienced high stress since the new school year started, a slight decrease from last year’s survey, which the organisation saw as a positive development. It noted that the transition from online to face-to-face learning would require some adjustment.

The organisation encouraged students to pay greater attention to their emotional, psychological and social well-being and to address negative emotions in a timely manner.

This statement is generic, unimaginative and out of touch with reality. It fails to look into causation and clings to vague glimmers of hope.

What is it going to take to save our students’ childhood, sanity and lives?

It’s easy to blame schools, and yes, schools need to take action that goes beyond awareness days. For example, stop the cycle of impossible workloads. How many struggle to join clubs or fun extracurricular activities because they are being held back for tests or talks?

The language in schools needs adjusting too – words like “competition”, “success” and “comparison” lead to competitive environments where coming second is seen as failure.

However, schools are only the vehicle; the problem is largely initiated by society in the form of parental demands. Local parents choose international schools presumably because they believe an international format would offer their children a better life and less homework. However, I noticed at one international school that, within a few months, many of these parents were censorious of the school’s homework policy or “the lack of it”, among other things. They demanded, in effect, that the children receive more work and less time to be children.

To turn a corner, we need a change in parents’ mindset. We must shine a light on parental demands and expectations, and stop allowing them to blame government policy.

Justin E. Hayward, Tai Po

Pursuit of happiness need not include having children

As a young person, I can understand people choosing not to have children. The cost of living has increased over the years as has the cost of raising a child. A recent study found the cost of raising a child until the age of 18 in China was 6.9 times its gross domestic product per capita, the second highest in the world.

Moreover, the modern work environment, which is characterised by long working hours and high career aspirations, often leaves little time and energy for child rearing.

The decision not to have children is a complex and deeply personal one. It’s crucial to respect and understand people’s choices. After all, in a diverse and ever-changing world, the pursuit of happiness should be the most treasured.

Mandy Yau, Tung Chung