The Naked Truth | Tiger parents, don’t sacrifice happy childhoods for long-term comfort – it’s about striking a balance
Traditional Chinese parents – especially mothers – can push children to breaking point with their over-dominance and quest for perfection. That is not a healthy attitude, says a Hong Kong concern group
Just as every manager has their own way of supervising their staff, every parent takes their own approach to raising their children.
Let’s imagine there are two different children. One is a high achiever who dedicates most of his or her free time to extracurricular activities. The parents have always actively encouraged the child to be their best, but this child doesn’t have a lot of free time for friends.
The second child achieves decent grades in school and takes part in their fair share of after-school clubs, but is by no means a high achiever. Nevertheless, the parents are supportive and dish out praise when the child does particularly well.
Which child do you think is the happier one?
Laissez-faire or “hands-off” parenting is rare in Chinese households because it is perceived as parental abandonment. And we can’t have that in Chinese families.
Traditional Chinese parenting has always been strict and hands-on. Amy Chua’s 2011 memoir Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother shone the international spotlight on this ultra-strict parenting style. Her book encapsulated the pushy, sometimes extreme and demanding Chinese style of parenting.