The Naked Truth | Why do we fall for the wrong person over and over again? Here’s how to break the cycle, love yourself, and find Mr or Ms Right
- You want to find your perfect partner, but for some reason you always seem to end up repeating toxic or loveless relationships
- Relationship coach Nathalie Sommer says the answer lies in loving and accepting yourself first
Many of us probably know someone who has a tendency to fall for the wrong person, or perhaps you yourself are guilty of being that person.
The old saying comes to mind: “Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.” It’s OK to make a mistake once, but consistently choosing the same wrong person is a worrying pattern of behaviour.
It begs the question: why do some of us keep choosing the wrong type of partner, or worse, marrying them? Some put it down to bad luck and peg themselves as “magnets” who are destined to be in bad relationships.
However, relationship experts believe it might have something to do with our mate selection mechanism, which sometimes tends to set us on “heartache mode”.
“What’s heartache mode?” you may ask. Let’s consider the following. Our subconscious mind draws us to certain types of people who trigger a familiar feeling, be it good or bad. We tend to interpret that feeling as “chemistry”, and this leads us to believe we have found “the one”, or at least a close approximation to it.