The festive season tends to put intense emotional pressure on those celebrating it alone. This year’s Christmas could be hugely challenging for many of us who are unable to spend it with our friends and family. Because of the restrictions on gatherings and lockdowns in some countries, Christmas may be a quieter affair – but this doesn’t mean that we can’t find alternative ways to enjoy it with those we care about. In fact, this is the perfect time of year to appreciate who we have in our lives, even if we are physically separated from them. Christine Deschemin, a certified hypnotherapist and founder of the Hong Kong-based Renewed Edge Hypnotherapy Centre, says: “If there is one year when you need to plan the Christmas holidays, it is this one. “Christmas is special because of a sense of togetherness. We ought to take a pause and allow ourselves to connect with others in a more meaningful way by reflecting on what makes this festive season special. “Most people remember past Christmases for their big dinners or the gift giving. Underneath those rites is a longing for that feeling of togetherness, for the reminder that you are special to others and that others are special to you.” Deschemin says this year provides us an excellent opportunity to remind those we care about how they are special to us. “Surprise them by sending a handwritten letter explaining what you are grateful for and how much they matter to you.” Do you have the emotional strength to survive times of crisis? If you are not keen on writing, find another medium where you can be genuine and thoughtful. You can make a video or an audio clip to surprise them. Of course, you can still enjoy the usual Christmas moments – like the dinner or the family games – through Zoom or another online meeting app. Don’t feel despair because of the physical distance; work on emotionally connecting with others and make the quality of your interactions stand out by being authentic. As for dealing with Covid-19 fatigue, Deschemin offers the following advice: “Take stock of the things that may be causing your fatigue. For many, the uncertainty of this difficult time is taking a toll on our mental well-being. “Identify reliable sources of information and stay away from hearsay, as rumours can breed unnecessary fear. And don’t forget to have a plan for difficult situations that may arise. For instance, you need to be prepared for a situation in which you come into contact with someone who has been diagnosed with Covid-19.” Deschemin says it’s essential to focus on the positive reasons for maintaining physical distancing by reminding ourselves that this is temporary, necessary, and there is a light at the end of the tunnel. “Reframe the situation: we are not doing social distancing; we are doing physical distancing. We have to learn to connect with others differently until we are able to be physically reunited with our loved ones.” There are many ways in which you can spread joy to others and find fulfilment. If you choose to do something helpful, you can donate to worthwhile causes or teach something new. Think about what would make a sizeable difference in other people’s lives that you can offer easily, Deschemin says. You can show others that you care about them by giving a gift. This year, you can be a bit more creative by giving a more personalised gift handmade by you, she says. When you spend quality time with others, it shows you are giving them your undivided attention, hence signalling that you care for them, she explains. And if your family and friends have got the festive season blues, you can help by urging them to stay active and plan fun events such as outdoor activities; offering to share some activities together; and reminding them that the festive season will last only a few days and that we will be back to our everyday routines soon. Most importantly, she says, you need to remind them they can create their own traditions – because there are no rules for how you spend your holidays. To avoid triggering the festive blues, plan ahead so that you can stay constructively busy throughout the holiday. “One of the biggest pitfalls is having too much unstructured time. You need to strike a balance between free time and planned activities. If you have always wanted to take up something new but were lacking the time to do it, you can make the most of that quiet time to get started,” Deschemin advises. Remember to take some time to pause and reflect on the blessings you have. Last but not least, experiment with new ways of celebrating or spending time. “What if you made your Christmas dinner lighter and packed the next day with fun activities?” Deschemin says. Luisa Tam is a correspondent at the Post