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Luisa Tam
SCMP Columnist
My Hong Kong
by Luisa Tam
My Hong Kong
by Luisa Tam

Hong Kong comes alive by learning Cantonese, but make sure you know the pitfalls when addressing your new ‘aunties and uncles’

  • Picking up a few Cantonese words will help expats, visitors dig deeper into city life
  • Even strangers can be an uncle or auntie – but how do you avoid offending someone?

The majority of Hongkongers might have adopted the Western way of life, and the city’s colonial history has certainly played a part in shaping its identity, but traditions that are distinctively Hong Kong still carry significant weight.

Understanding the Hong Kong culture is more than just knowing about the traditional festivals, its people and language, it’s also about the way of communication, the food, the movies and maybe even their passion for playing mahjong and gambling at the horse races, to name just a few.

A significant part of Hong Kong’s vibrant and colourful culture comes from its language – Cantonese.

You could never replace Cantonese as the language of Hong Kong

While some would still argue that Cantonese is a dialect, with a rich 2000-year history, Cantonese has firmly earned its place as the unofficial language of Hong Kong.

In order to get to the heart of Hong Kong and its people, one must fully embrace the language or at least get to grips with its use. Hongkongers speak Cantonese loudly and proudly, and so for others to understand us, you must first learn to speak our language.

Okay, let me rephrase. You don’t have to become a fluent Cantonese speaker to assimilate into Hong Kong’s culture. While it certainly helps, getting to know our customs and the way we speak will certainly help you understand some of our unique cultural tics.

For those of you who may not know, the first day of Lunar New Year started on January 25 this year. Like any major Chinese holiday, a great deal of food is consumed and relatives from far and wide will travel from across the world to come together and celebrate.

And for those of you who aren’t as familiar with Chinese customs and forms of address, you may have heard terms like “auntie” and “uncle” being used rather liberally.

Hong Kong people often address strangers as if they are close friends or relatives. For example, over the Lunar New Year, you might have heard many people call other auntie or uncle and wondered how on Earth these people were related.

Quite often they are not, it is just a polite way for the young to address older – even slightly older – people.

In some cases, they might be related but very often they are not. They might just be friends of the family or even people they barely know or have just met.

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This happens more so during Lunar New Year, during which children and young adults greet older people with “Kung hei fat choi”, and it only seems natural to call them uncle and aunt even if they are only meeting for the first time.

It is seen as a sign of respect, especially when they are being given lucky money in lai see packets.

But be careful not to get into the habit of calling a woman in her 30s “auntie”, even though she might be an auntie herself, because it somehow implies she is old.

The term can be more acceptable during the festive Lunar New Year, but outside of that season most women are more sensitive about being seen as an auntie. Unless they are really the aunt of your children, avoid using the term altogether.

The best way to understand Hong Kong culture is to get out and about and try your hand at a few Cantonese words. Photo: Dickson Lee

Other alternatives you can use all year round is leng neoi which means pretty girl. This phrase, on the other hand, is welcomed by females of all ages in Hong Kong – even women in their 80s.

The male version, leng zai means pretty boy and can also be used to address a male of any age.

Strangely, leng zai when used in a local Chinese tea house – cha chaan teng – also means white rice while leng neoi means congee.

Hongkongers love hanging out at their cha chaan tengs and if you are ever there, don’t be surprised to hear someone ordering a bowl of leng zai or a bowl of leng neoi to take away.

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The exact origins of these two terms are a bit fuzzy, but if I was to use my imaginative interpretation – it is a way to describe the texture of rice – a bowl of white rice is as desirable as a good-looking young man and the silky and cottony texture of a bowl of congee is comparable to a pretty young woman, figuratively speaking.

The best way to understand the local culture is to get out there and take chances even though sometimes people in Hong Kong can be a bit unforgiving if you get it wrong. Don’t be put off, go ahead and order a bowl of leng zai or leng neoi next time and see how it goes.

This is a new column by Luisa Tam, a Post correspondent, who also hosts video tutorials on Cantonese language which is now part of Cathay Pacific’s in-flight entertainment programme.

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