Sorely missed

SO, farewell then the BBC. As Private Eye's E.J. Thribb would have said: '''This is the BBC . . . that was your catchphrase'.'' Perhaps more in hope than in charity, the BBC is still sending out its schedules. Here is a quick guide to what you will not be able to see today: Floyd On Food. At 12.25pm gregarious and slightly overweight gastronaut Keith Floyd will not be visiting a Royal Navy field kitchen and will not be cooking fish and chips in a local English fish and chip shop.

Holiday. At 6.05pm former gymnast Jill Dando will not be attending the ultimate party - the Mardi Gras in New Orleans. Kathy Taylor will not be going to Sardinia and the Lacey family from Liverpool will not be testing three of Britain's top theme parks.

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